Just A Dream

I honestly sometimes wonder what it feels to fall in love, wholeheartedly. To feel like someone is your other half, like you are their other half. To care about someone as much as they care about you, to know that they would try their best to keep you in their life, to be sure of someone. I have honestly never felt such strong emotions. I have loved. But I can't say that I have loved someone to the extent that I have given my all, to love someone even if things didn't work out. I'm not saying I dislike  my exes,I just feel..nothing. Nothing at all. And feeling nothing sucks.

I have seen so many failed relationships to the point that I just chuckle at the word "forever". How easily people in my generation throw the world "love" or "forever" around. I remember being 16 when I was in "love". I remember how I isolated myself with my ex from everyone else and how we would just live by the saying "it's me and you against the world" because at that time, I remember not wanting anyone else. I remember how I skipped school for the fact that I could spend my mornings just lying in his single bed while he sits on the uncomfortable chair by the computer, playing his video games. I remember how we barely texted because we spent almost every minute of the day together. I remember going out every night to some new place just to try out some new restaurant, or smoke a hookah in the city, just planning our future. I remember how I held his hand in the car and resting my head against his shoulder while he drives me home. I remember how he would creep in my room every night just so we could fall asleep to some movie I downloaded. I remember how I wanted it to work out so bad. 

But one day I woke up and I realised that everything was just a routine, it was the same pattern, the things we did and my feelings started to fade. And I told myself that it was just some phase I was going through, that I will get over it, that I will look at him the same way I did. But I never did. My feelings never came back. And all that was left were just memories.

Here are some of the songs that reminds me of 2010. Sorry to bore you guys with my rants.

I should stop.

Have a good Thursday.